Poll #1338643
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Should I dye my hair purple or brown?

I've been SO busy on my trip. As I was leaving Disneyland I heard the news, I responded by screaming jumping and skipping all the way to my hotel. I told every person I passed because I was so excited! Some Republicans may say that I'm not patriotic because I believe in making sure every American has a shot at success, free speech, and in giving the people the power. They can say whatever they want, but I LOVE my country. America deserves someone who will fight for the underdog, someone who can give America the foundation for success. It's time to take our control back from people are drunk on power. To those who voted for McCain, consider it a consolation prize that you're lucky enough to have a president that gives a shit about how you feel; if only the Democrats in 2004 had been so lucky. My heart goes out to all of the gay families who are suffering a disheartening setback.

-- Peace

I'm sitting on my ass reading LJ while taboo_elf makes me Sinigang. It's nice to have someone else do the cooking for me. What are you eating for dinner tonight?

Also I signed up to beta test Hello Kitty Online but I still can't sign in even after going through all of the account activation stuff. I'm so sad I wanted to say Hello to Kitty!

Can't sleep because I keep coughing and hacking phlegm up out of my lungs. I can't stop wheezing and it's getting to the point that my dreams are about trying to defeat the demon that is possessing my lungs and making it difficult to breath. Course the only solution in my dream was to breath and cough. I'm so tired T_T Maybe I'll get up and make some tea, I've never been sick like this before I don't even know what to take for this. Maybe I should go to the doctor. I definitely don't feel like birthday raving in this condition. On the upside being sick has given me an excuse to lay in bed and study.

We picked a house and put a deposit down this week. It's an awesome place with a jet tub, marble floors in the kitchen, and a huge yard, we get the keys on Sunday! It will be nice to get most of the moving taken care of before I'm out of town. Anyway... that's all for now folks.

So who wants to gay marry me while I'm in SF next week?

MMMMmmm I love me some tofu Adobo. I know how to make it just right so that the tofu isn't soggy and the sauce is delicious, but it's a secret so you can't know how I do it.


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This week I received a bag with a card telling me about the Post Office food drive so I took a minute to ransack my pantry and get rid of some extra things. I can always restock when I got to the grocery and it's nice to give back :) What's in store for the hungry people of Seattle?


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This is my kitty, I love his personality. He's a Leo just like me! RAWR!



DAWWWW ISN'T HE CUUUUTE? :D We even made Myspace for him. He's a typical Leo attention whore :p

The Bay is one of my favorite songs by him, not because it's an especially good beat, but because of the lyrics. I've always been semi nomadic but I spent a lot of my really young years living in The Bay, primarily East Oakland (Fruitvale and other neighborhoods) and in the Mission or the Haight of San Francisco. San Francisco will always feel like home to me. I love running into people my Dad knows everywhere we go, I love the feeling I get when I'm there. I love all the good Filipino food too :D My life and my personality is all deeply rooted there even though I don't live there anymore and I haven't for a long time, it's one of those few places that has played a constant roll in my life. In fact, my great grandparents even owned a Bakery there that was torn down. It's a post office now, but I went there last time I was in town and it still felt very nostalgic.

Anyway, I was checking the Chop Suey show calendar because I've been wanting to go to a show with taboo_elf He really likes Zion I too, but the show is on a Thursday so he probably can't go. Anyone on my friends list who wants to go should drop me a line. The Cover charge is 15$ and it's on the 20th He plays in The Bay a lot but I always seem to barely miss him when I'm in town.

PS I had to use this icon because it's a picture of me trick or treating in the Haight when I was like 3 or 4. Cute huh?

So as America gleefully prepares to replace the "." There is more and more political chatter, more frequently we are encountering the ever present prefabricated political blog rant. Some of you have been on my friends list for long enough to know my political stance, some of you know me in real life, but most of you haven't seen Me + Politics. There is a reason for this. Once upon a time I had dreams of majoring in Political Science, changing the world, and all of that huff puff liberal altruism shit. However, the elections in 2004 were an altogether heartbreaking process that ended in me coming to the sudden realization that I don't give a fuck.

It's not that I actually expected good to triumph over evil, it's more that I couldn't stand the despair of watching our nation get choke fucked any longer. Those of you who are close to me may have noticed that when caring becomes too taxing I simply make a choice NOT to care anymore. This seems to be the case with politics as well. Americans seem to have grown lazy about protecting the ideals of this Nation, because of that I'm beginning to feel like like they deserve what's coming to them.

It's as if I'm watching this Great Nation die of cancer, very, very, quickly. I still haven't even fully accepted that we attacked Iraq. Instead, I could be likened to a cheesy soap opera in which the mother disowns her son and declares that he was never born and does not exist. President? What President?! I Have no President?! President of th USA?! What in God's name are you talking about? As Bush and his dip shit frat buddies dig our grave deeper and deeper, clinging to my alternate reality becomes easier and easier. Why do people hate Bush more than any other scum that has graced the halls of the White House? I say it's because he's done more than the typical stuffy old republican. I feel like he has hijacked my cultural identity, and I know I'm not alone in that. He's misrepresenting me, and millions of other citizens, that's the kind of resentment that I feel for our democratic system. America is shitting all over itself and no one is planning on cleaning it up. I strongly believe that things will continue to get rapidly worse until the people of this country are backed into a corner SO SMALL that they have to create a revolution. No system is flawless, and as we spread Democracy around the world as if it's magical faerie dust let's not forget that that logic applies to us too.

As far as I'm concerned I on my own little island off of the coast of reality. I like it here, I don't plan on moving back to America any time soon.

Disclaimer: I in no way condone acts of Domestic Terrorism or any Terrorism at all, please do not waste our tax dollars by making a lame report to Homeland Security about my LJ.

kthx, Natalie

1. Psychologist (Duh!)
2. Gerontologist(Probably, but i could find better.) 3. Consumer Scientist (I get very angry at the way advertisements are made to manipulate people.)
4. Fashion Designer (I've made some cute clothing designs!) 5. Website Designer(Ugh, never.) 6. Costume Designer 7. Social Worker (Suprised?)
8. Home Care Worker (Aw HELL NAW!) 9. Clergy 10. Graphic Designer 11. Humanitarian Aid Worker 12. Cartoonist / Comic Illustrator
13. Writer
14. Mediator

BOOYA!

The rest of them kind of suck. Sorry for not writing more. I've been pretty busy lately with various things. I'm starting school soon, and I've been keeping up with your entries. I don't know when I will have time/inspiration to write again.

Take Care, Natalie

Karl Rove Resigns.

One must wonder, is this a pathetic attempt to save his career and reputation before the democrats really have their way with him during the elections, or is it just because the neocons wanted to reshape the appearance of the white house?

In case watching this documentary has made you decide to give up on my gender you can buy your own here, at the Real Doll website. There is some doll nudity in it so you might want to wait until you're at home to watch.

"Now that the show is over, and we have jointly exercised our constitutional rights, we would like to leave you with one very important thought. Sometime in the future, you may have the opportunity to serve as a juror in a so-called obscenity case. It would be wise to remember that the same people who would stop you from viewing an adult film may be back next year to complain about a book, or even a TV program. If you can be told what you can see or read, then it follows that you can be told what to say or think. Defend your constitutionally protected rights. No one else will do it for you. Thank you."

I wanted to post about our trip, and I may still do so but in the mean time I have something incredibly immature and hilarious to show all of you. I found this while surfing and I have't been able to stop laughing about it.


Ladies and gentlemen I present to you The Turd Twister



It comes in other fun shapes such as, four leaf clover, gingerbread man, bat, and spaghetti.

Forgive me for being immature but I find this to be absolutely hilarious and I cannot stop laughing. This is totally going on my wishlist.

So nothing out of the ordinary has been going on here, the move is rapidly approaching and my stress levels are rising but that's typical for me. I guess you could say I'm giddy and impatient I just want to hurry up and get a job in Seattle. Not having a job is driving me crazy, being codependent on Anthony is a gigantic monster inside of me that has been growing. I'm not the type to like riding on someone else's back for very long because it limits my personal freedom. I tried to have a positive talk with him about my situation and it turned into an argument, lame. I hope you guys will appreciate my unusually personal entry today because I usually don't discuss the logistics of my personal life, but today it feels relevant. One of the things I have to do is get a job and save enough money to take driving lessons and also to pay for insurance. Learning to empower yourself isn't an easy, and I feel that the next step in empowering myself is to cut myself off from those who behave as hindrances.

I'm getting to a point with my astrology studies where I'm finally starting to learn about Leos and how to live a life that will keep me positive, motivated, and vibrant. One of the personal changes I've noted within myself is that I'm starting to become more comfortable with my own faults. Looking back I can think of times when people would say things to me about my own personal issues that would make me flip. Now I understand that part of loving someone is seeing that they have problems and encouraging them to work through them. I DO have a lot of personal problems so, in the spirit of acknowledging them I will write some of the notable ones in here. No excuses for them, just ways I can try to work through them. these are listed in no particular order.

1. A constant need to validate my own humanity and existence. Since I can remember I have always felt like some sort of anomaly in the Universe, not in a cool or special way...just in a freak of nature missing link sort of way. For example, when I was younger I had a deep seated fear that when I was finally ready to lose my virginity I would turn out to have some horrible birth defect or mutation that would make the guy run away screaming. Or thinking that my speech and and mannerisms were unusually abstract in comparison to other's. It's true that so far my life certainly has'nt been typical by any stretch of the word, in fact it's so complicated and strange that it would be painful to explain it to anyone. I do believe that in some ways it has made me a very unique person, but it's in our uniqueness that we are all just the same. I wonder how many other people question themselves in this way.

2. Passion serves as my drive. Now I am a very passionate person, but it's a very unhealthy habit when most of the things you get done are only done out of passion. Not only do you get much less done, but it kills your passion because you aren t using it in the right way. I still haven't figured out exactly how to correct this problem within myself, and I don't always know how to tap into my will since usually I have to be passionate about something before I can use it. Bad cycle eh? One thing I am passionate about is personal growth and change, so I have hope that with time and experience I will find a solution to this inner problem, because it too is disempowering.

3. Faking it when I can't make it. This is one of those things that I've discovered in myself since I've learned more about Leos. When I have poor self esteem I can be a nightmare to deal with, I'm rude, selfish, domineering and no one wants to be around me. When I feel good about myself and stop seeking validation through others I naturally attract positive things to my life and to the life of those around me. So far I have been steadily improving my self esteem and I firmly believe that i will correct this problem withing myself within a year. I also have hope that through correcting this problem I will be bringing myself closer to solving other problems that I have, primarily the 2nd one I mentioned because it is the most troubling.

So there we have it, I have documented my own personal issues so that I can refer back to this entry if I should need reminding and so that possibly you all will be amused or inspired. Any input, advice, or constructive criticism is welcome.

- Natalie
I really love this so I will paste it as well,

I am of the nature to grow old.
There is no way to escape growing old.

I am of the nature to have ill health.
There is no way to escape ill health.

I am of the nature to die.
There is no way to escape death.

All that is dear to me and everyone I love are of the nature to change.
There is no way to escape being separated from them.

My actions are my only true belongings.
I cannot escape the consequences of my actions.
My actions are the ground upon which I stand.

I put that new memey thing behind the cut if anyone cares.

( memey )

Haha, I had to try spelling it hurr. Anyway, last night I had the overwhelming urge to give my hair hte old snip snip. Up until now I've always had tragic experiences when cutting my own hair so it took me a while of contemplating in the mirror to decide if I liked it or not. I owe, laren for the linkage to the picture I used for the hair idea. Thank you and much heartiez!



Ooooh It's like i'm swimming in air.

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